At least, that was what Jurao thought he would do.
Feyl had declared he would leave the two of them alone for Jurao to make his confession in peace, which the Demon King thought was considerate of him. However, as Feyl was absent, Jurao wasn’t sure what to do with himself otherwise. He sat in silence at his usual place on the couch next to Braelin, sipping his brandy and thinking it might have been better to have his friend present.
“Is Feyl not coming tonight?” Braelin asked, seeming to have noticed the man would have arrived by now.
“No, he decided not to,” Jurao replied.
“Ah,” his gardener nodded, returning to his notes.
After a few moments, Jurao asked, “What are you writing.”
“I’m compiling notes on pests,” Braelin replied, looking between book passages and his own writing, “There isn’t anything recorded about plant diseases, but most of the ones I encountered could be countered with the same methods I used for human plants or providing fresh blood. Hm… I should have Gaele put in a request for hay…”
“Hay,” Jurao asked, leaning over a little to see if he could make out the man’s notes. Unfortunately, they were in human script, so he had no idea what they said.
The human glanced up but didn’t move away or seem bothered by the proximity as he went on, “A good layer of hay helps capture moisture and prevents weeds. It probably wouldn’t do much good against demon realm insects, but I have Shiny for that anyway.”
“The mirage spider,” the Demon King mused, smiling.
Braelin nodded, “It seems like the main difference between human and demon plant ailments and pests is the size and aggression - other than that, the same principles apply.”
Jurao hummed, and thought now would be a good time to express his romantic interest in his gardener. But, for some reason, what came out of his mouth instead was, “I’d like to see Shiny for myself, if that’s possible.”
The human hummed, then nodded, “I think she should be out and about at this time - she’s nocturnal.”
The Demon King nodded, then rose, “Well then, I’ll get an outer robe.”
Jurao tried, as they walked through the castle to the gardens, to express his romantic interest again - but found the words continued to escape him.
When they reached the gardens, Braelin had barely stepped off the back veranda before clicking his tongue twice. He stood waiting just in front of the Labyrinthine Hedges, sighing.
“What is it,” Jurao asked.
“Feyl said it looked bad for you if we were in the gardens together alone at night,” the human replied, “But I don’t know if Shiny will come this close to the castle.”
From behind, Jurao heard one of the guards at the door snort - then quickly cough to poorly cover their amusement.
“That is a problem,” the Demon King agreed.
“Maybe… ” Braelin trailed off as the hedges shook, looking towards the sound.
After a moment, the area in front of the hedge seemed to warp - and a four-foot-tall mirage spider dropped its camouflage, boxy pink crystalline body coming into view.
The guards startled behind them, one saying, “Your highness-!”
“It’s fine,” Jurao said, holding a hand back to stay them without taking his eyes off the spider.
Braelin crouched down, holding out a hand, “Hey, it’s alright, here, girl.”
Shiny’s pedipalps seemed to reach forward uncertainly before she hesitantly stepped forward until she reached the human. She felt his hand with her pedipalps, then seemed to chirp as she bumped her fangs against his hand.
He smiled, straightening up and moving his hand to pet her head - which seemed to cause her to purr.
“I never thought a human would scare me more than the King…” one of the guards muttered lowly.
The other shushed them.
Jurao couldn’t blame the first for the sentiment - asking his gardener, “Is it safe to approach.”
Braelin hummed, then shook his head, “Stay there; I’ll bring her over to you.”
“Alright then,” the Demon King said, standing patiently.
The human slowly walked backwards towards Jurao, leading the spider after him with more petting. He stopped when he accidentally ran into the Demon King, looking up to say, “Ah, sorry, my lord.”
“It’s fine,” Jurao replied, feeling more conscious of their proximity in a way that made his face heat up. He put a hand on Braelin’s shoulder as he took a step to the side of the human, leaning down slowly.
Braelin moved his hand so those pedipalps took hold of the limb again, reaching out to pull up one of Jurao’s hands so he could transfer the pedipalps between them.
Jurao forgot his hand was still on the human’s shoulder as he held still at the odd, bristling sensation of the pedipalps.
Shiny explored his hand with the limbs, then - as she had with Braelin, pressed his hand against her smooth fangs. But rather than stay to be pet, the spider camouflage and fled.
“She stayed longer than I thought she would,” Braelin observed.
It was then Jurao noticed he was still touching the human, and cleared his throat as he stood and took his hand back. He asked, “You don’t interact much.”
Braelin didn’t seem to notice, shaking his head, “I mean, Shiny is a spider - they’re not really affection-seekers.”
“That’s true,” the Demon King said. He remembered Minaz confirming that he touched Braelin often without realizing it - he was beginning to see what she’d meant. He added, “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” his gardener said, then smiled, “I’m just glad you didn’t want to get rid of her - she’s very helpful.”
“Yes,” Jurao said, again reflecting that Braelin had a nice smile. A gentle one that matched his personality. Clearing his throat again, he said, “I suppose we should turn in.”
Braelin nodded, “It is getting late.”
The Demon King led the way back through the castle, trying to figure out why it seemed so difficult to state his feelings. Usually, he had no issues in that regard - but anytime he attempted to confess these feelings, it was as if his tongue had swollen up too large for his mouth.
Is this… feeling nervous? he reflected, staring at the ceiling as he lay in bed. As he thought it, it felt right - it matched how others had described it, anyway.
He sighed, thinking, This feeling really is awful. I see why everyone hates it.
***
“So, how did last night go?” Feyl asked while helping him get ready for the next day.
“I wasn’t able to confess,” Jurao replied.
“That does explain why Braelin’s still on the couch,” his valet hummed, “Thought I figured with the two of you, that might have just seemed more comfortable,” he clapped two hands, “Anyway - why not? What happened?”
“I believe I was too nervous,” the Demon King sighed, frowning.
“...nervous,” Feyl said, “You?”
“I know,” Jurao sighed again, crossing his lower arms and cupping his chin with an upper hand, “But whenever I attempted to express my feelings - nothing.”
“Huh,” Feyl said, “And here I thought the mirage spider just killed the mood…”
“It is intriguing he managed to tame one,” the Demon King smiled.
“And that it’s been in the gardens long enough for him to do so,” Feyl sighed, “Well, tell you what - I’ll ask Braelin about human courtship rituals when we have an etiquette lesson today. Then you can try using those to convey your feelings.”
“Thank you, Feyl,” Jurao said. He hadn’t been sure what else to do if he couldn’t say his feelings directly.
His valet waved a hand, “If he’s aware of them, he should be able to recognize them. Hopefully…”
“Hopefully,” the Demon King frowned.
Feyl sighed, but rather than remark on his tone, said, “Well, you’re aware of demon courtship rituals, but you don’t always recognize them, do you?”
“Ah,” Jurao nodded, then sighed, “This romance business is complicated indeed.”
“Indeed,” his valet smiled one of his rare genuine smiles of amusement- then quickly replaced it with a wider presentation smile and said, “In any case, go on and get to breakfast. I’ll see if I can figure out some of those human courtship rituals before then.”
The Demon King nodded again and allowed himself to be half pushed out of his suite. He offered a wave to the half-awake Braelin sitting up on the couch on his way, which the human returned with a slight nod.
On his way to the dining hall, he ran into Minaz, who also asked how his night went.
“I wasn’t able to express myself,” Jurao sighed again.
“What, he didn’t get it?” Minaz asked, walking a half step behind him.
The Demon King shook his head, “No, I wasn’t able to express my feelings at all - I believe I was too nervous.”
“Nervous,” Minaz arched a brow, “You?”
“Feyl said that exact thing,” Jurao frowned, “But yes - I attempted several times to tell Braelin I had a romantic interest but was unable to speak the words.”
“Well,” his Right Hand sighed, “What are you nervous about?”
“I’ve considered this,” the Demon King said, nodding to the others as they entered the dining hall, “And I suppose the most present concern is that expressing my feelings will make him uncomfortable.”
“Expressing what feelings will make who uncomfortable?” Jouvi asked.
Jurao took his seat, replying simply, “Telling Braelin I have a romantic interest in him.”
Festi sat up and motioned towards the ceiling, then sighed and slouched back, “No, I… it’s not worth it. I’m letting it go.”
“I do apologize for causing anyone else frustration,” the Demon King said, “But I did believe I had no such feelings at the time.”
“We know,” a few people said at once.
Gnori pounded the table and demanded, “What do you mean you have-urk!”
Gavven giggled as if e hadn’t sucker punched the castle guard captain in the gut as e asked, “I’m more curious about what made you realize it, my lord. Though I don’t think the entire castle needs to know at once, hm?”
Gnori grumbled, rubbing his stomach without comment.
Jurao didn’t see the harm in answering, “Well, I had been helping Braelin with those clay irrigation pots in the Embracing Garden when-”
Kloy loudly cleared his throat to interrupt and smiled wanly as he asked, “Was this a repeat of the occurrence that brought you into my office the other day?”
“Yes,” the Demon King said.
“Then I believe, my lord,” Kloy suggested, “That those… details may be better kept to yourself?”
Jurao considered this, then said, “Ah, I see.”
“What details would make you stop him that hard…?” Jouvi asked, left eyes squinted while the right pair were wide.
“It’s not proper for polite conversation,” Kloy said neutrally, looking askance.
“Moving on from that,” Minaz blinked her own widened eyes, “Is that the only thing you’re nervous about?”
“Nervous?” Festi asked, “You?”
“Yes,” Jurao sighed, “At least, I believe so…”
Noticing the King’s gaze moving to him, Kloy straightened up in his seat, “What symptoms were you experiencing, my lord?”
“Whenever I attempted to express myself, I found I couldn’t,” Jurao replied, “As if my tongue were so big it blocked the sound.”
“That does sound like nervousness,” his physician replied evenly, “Though relatively mild, if those were the only symptoms.”
The Demon King nodded.
“Again,” Minaz said, then paused, “Nevermind, I’ll ask later.”
Jurao heard it too - Feyl chatting with Braelin in the hall as they approached.
“… or a personal weapon,” his valet was saying.
“Why would you give someone a weapon as a courtship gift?” Braelin asked, and Jurao could picture his frown of confusion.
“To show you wouldn’t use it against the person you’re interested in,” Feyl replied breezily, “And that you don’t mind if they use it against you.”
“Shouldn’t you trust them not to use it that way?” Braelin replied.
“A very human perspective,” Feyl sighed, coming into view in the doorway. As usual, he walked inside without care, “We hope someone won’t use a weapon against us, but if given as a romantic gift, we’re communicating that we feel strongly enough that being betrayed would not diminish those feelings.”
Braelin hummed, walking next to Feyl as he said, “I suppose since it’s a declaration, you can’t demand reciprocation.”
Feyl snapped his fingers, “Exactly!”
“Did you have an interest in demon courtship rituals, Braelin?” Gavven grinned in glee.
“Not really,” the human replied, taking his seat, “But Feyl was asking me about human ones, so…”
“Imagine that,” Minaz drawled, giving the valet a sideways look.
“Well, you all know me,” Feyl grinned, “When it comes to potential future lovers, I always like to be prepared.”
“Gross,” Jouvi replied.
Maybe I should have just asked Feyl to tell Braelin for me, Jurao thought, recognizing that his valet was covering for him with that lie.
“Don’t be jealous,” Feyl waved a hand, breezing back out of the hall, “Well, ta for now, I’ve more important things to do than dally here.”
“I still don’t understand how you two are friends,” Festi sighed, then held up a hand, “I’m not looking for an explanation; I know the story.”
“We are very different people,” Jurao conceded.
“By the way,” Jouvi asked, “Is there really a mirage spider in the gardens…?”
“Mm-hm,” Braelin confirmed, “I named her Shiny.”
“I thought you were joking, my lord,” the groundskeeper sighed, rubbing her temples, “But I should know better than that…”
Kloy chuckled, “That’s why I ordered the anti-venom for our supplies already.”
“I hadn’t thought of that,” Jurao admitted, though he immediately saw the wisdom in it.
“I’m pretty sure as long as she has enough bugs to catch, she won’t attack anyone,” Braelin said, “But that’s just a guess, really.”
“Very reassuring,” Minaz said, then asked, “By the way, what did you think of demon courtship rituals?”
“Yes,” Gavven giggled, “What did you think, Braelin?”
The human shrugged, “Confusing, but so are human ones. Wouldn't it be easier to just tell someone you had a romantic interest in them…?”
Jurao felt like he’d been hit by something, though he couldn’t help but agree - it would be simpler to confess outright, if only he could manage it.
Gavven, of course, was off giggling about this.
“It’s not that easy!” Gnorri yelled, coming to the defense, “If you’d ever had a romantic interest, you’d know that!”
Minaz sighed, closing her eyes.
Braelin hummed, picking at his food as he said, “Well, you’re right that I haven’t, so I’ll take your word for it.”
Jurao felt like he’d been hit again - it made sense, as Bralein had already said before he’d never had a romantic interest, but hearing it after realizing his own interest made the Demon King feel… a little hurt.
Maybe it’s better not to confess after all… he thought, wondering if that counted as a preemptive rejection.